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Andrew Vanwyngarden - Intro Lyrics

Well, hello folks! My name's Gordon Johnson. You don't look like you're from around these parts. I guess you're looking for the Penis aren't ya? Well, hell, they've got a great evening planned for you all! Piñatas, a whole siest...

Oh, oh, hey! Look over there on that ridge! That's ol' Flick Noopy ridin' in on his trusty steed, Penis. And over there, that's Cowhand Sammy and Cowpoke Han. Fetchin' wood for tonight's bonfire. I'll tell you what, them Penis boys sure are a big help around here

Well-- hey, what's that I hear? Sounds like The Microphone Five! Boy, you're in for a treat. Well, hell, I'll catch back up with you tumbleweeds in about three minutes. So gather 'round the fire, and take a listen, and enjoy Glitter Penis