[Hook: Jon Hendershot & Andrew East of Alive In Color]
Nobody asked you to hit replay/
On my soul’s home videos I hate/
How I'm strapped to a movie theatre chair/
Eyes held open; reliving
Shame, pain, heartbreak I'm hoping you/
Heal my heart, my chest gets tight and I lose my breath/
Father heal my heart; before these tiny triggers remind me to death/
[Verse 1: Illijam]
I try to tiptoe
Cuz
Memories are light sleepers /
Right from the getgo;
That mortar hit my minesweeper/
Anywhere in this mine field, and anywhere in this mind field/
Recollections detonate; this grief is all my mind feels/
There ain't an anesthetic that can numb away my misery/
The ones I love the dearest cause my severest injuries/
I can’t lie, I’m not good at goodbyes/
And when I try, and when I don’t, I own this tortured mind/
[Verse 2: Illijam]
I wish we could wake up, somewhere down the line/
Maybe it would seem like a bad dream, and everything would be fine/
And I wouldn't ache and desolation would be replaced with brighter days/
And we’d be amazed there I go again daydreaming/
Then I flashback and I rehash, every little good thing we had/
Everyone sees I'm detached, 24/7 I relapse/
I loved you w/ all that I had, my misery tells me that's true/
It's agony how every scent, sight, & sound reminds me of you/
Catch me spazzing under my breath, paroxysm on my face/
When I recall how I compromised; I gave my naked heart; now I feel betrayed/
I look in the mirror and I hate who I see, I feel so abandoned O God hear my plea/
I'm losing my way in the wake of this bomb that has left me bereaved/
And I try to pray, but I am feeling like nobody hearing my cries/
I hate holidays cuz all I play is reruns
In my mind/
I fear this will never get better, and I cannot hold out for much longer/
I'm shivering in this crater waiting for the next round of bombers’ trauma/
[Outro 1: Jon Hendershot of Alive In Color]
Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art;
Thou my best Thought, by day or by night
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light
[Outro 2: Jon Hendershot of Alive In Color]
Be Thou my Vision, when everything’s dark/
Strengthen my soul so I don't disembark/
You are my highest joy; I'm a fool if I leave/
Comfort my hurting heart & help me believe/