[PREMINGER]
I've been bowing, I've been scraping
I've been lying like a rug
And for ten long years I've had to pay my dues
But today I am escaping
For the last gold has been dug
It was waiting there, so how could I refuse?
I'm returning home a hero
Who's discovered mighty wealth
And what better husband could a princess choose?
I'm the suitor who will suit her
Bring the kingdom back to health
And I'll wear the crown, for how could I refuse?
Raise every glass and rouse every cheer
Praise that the reign of Preminger is here
Master in charge of all that I see
All hail me!
And by marrying the princess
I get all that I desire
Like a moat, an ermine coat and palace views
Even though she treats me coldly
It's a sign of inner fire
For inside, she's thinking, "How can I refuse?"
[NACK, spoken]
Right, except for this one little problem, boss
[PREMINGER, spoken]
Prince Boss to you!
[NACK, spoken]
Right, the queen decided to marry her off to the king of Dulcinea next week
[PREMINGER, spoken]
What? Making a decision without me?
Who does she think she is?
[NICK, spoken]
Uh, the Queen?
[PREMINGER, spoken]
You, simpering simpleton!
[NICK, spoken]
Well, she is the Queen
She's got a crown and a scepter and sits in her big fancy chair and always—
[PREMINGER, spoken]
Silencio!
(sung)
No!
I won't let go!
This peasant's son won't turn and run because some reckless royal chose another beau
Ah!
It's a temporary setback
It's a momentary lapse
But conveniently my ego doesn't bruise
And the moment that I get back
I will show them who's the boss
You can bet your bullion there'll be no "I do's"
Yes, suppose the girl goes missing
So the king says "Au revoir"
Then I find her, bring her back and make the news
Then the queen will be so grateful
That she'll pledge the heir to moi
And I'll humbly tell her, "How can I refuse?"
[NICK, spoken]
Yeah
[PREMINGER]
When our ceremony's over
I'll arise and take the throne
And that nitwit Anneliese can kiss my shoes
For the kingdom and the castle
Will be mine and mine alone
If the crown should fit, then how can I refuse?
[All, PREMINGER, NACK & NICK]
So get ready with the roses
And stand by with the champagne
When you've got a brilliant plan, you never lose
Yes, before this chapter closes
I'll (He'll) be big as Charlemagne
It's a thankless job, but how can I (he) refuse?
How can I (he) refuse?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!