[Verse 1]
Churning ice cream and Disaronno
In the midst of dish pit hell
I'll drink the leftover milkshake
Til my gut churns as well
It's getting hectic
I've detected
One day I'll be diabetic
But I can't afford to take a break
To focus on my health
[Chorus]
If you find you're craving dairy
At the burger joint downtown
A ten dollar milkshake
Is a massive fucking shakedown
But I'd like to say
We make the best shakes around
So I'd better take advantage of my free pass
To chug those fuckers down
[Verse 2]
If I were lactose intolerant
I'd find it just ridiculous
Not to throw free milkshakes
And cops and politicians
I just can't let
These concoctions go to waste
I'd rather see em smeared
All over Doug Ford's face
With the chocolate drizzle dripping down
His ugly fucking chin
Onto his expensive suit
I'd consider that a win
[Chorus]
If you find you're craving dairy
At the burger joint downtown
A ten dollar milkshake
Is a massive fucking shakedown
But I'd like to say
We make the best shakes around
So I'd better take advantage of my free pass
To chug those fuckers down
Chug those fuckers down
Chug those fuckers down