Smoothness of Money LyricsYou remind me of British summertime
lush lawns, green countryside,
M&S sandwiches, eating lunch outside
with your glossy, perfect family, so kind they made me nervous.
Golden retrievers, a farmhouse, a pool
The security money could bring.
A life that could have been mine
Lies that could have been yours
I was 21, an amateur and lacking the self-worth to choose better.
We were cartoon versions of an atomic
bomb button, pressing up against each other
until one of us blew. You hid your weakness
behind haircuts and emo music
m y s p a c e p r o f i l e s
and webcams you spoke to girls
called “jaymie <3” on
I hid behind thrift clothes, binge-purge cycles
and bad hair dyes. I picked up a microwave
meal for you on our 2nd date and thought it was love.
“These are the best years of your life”
You had a world I wasn’t allowed into.
I was rough around the edges, yet to be popular
and you were embarrassed of me.
I didn’t have the smoothness of m o n e y like you did.
But one day I would
And you would hate that I’d earned it.