I was born to acquire suffering
Actually, I've known that since long ago
So perhaps that's why the teachers told me too
That my smile exists to make everyone happy
I, who grew up cute, am just a toy
Becoming an outlet for violent impulses
One day, with THAT enough to numb the nerves
They f***ed me thoroughly, drenched in medication
The world in my eyes trembles
Sharp distortions pulse with a twitch, a thump
In the haze, to the delighted necks
I weakly smile back one more time
I'm sorry I was born
Kindness is given with suffering as a condition
That's why I named the fear of death ‘love’
You all eagerly throw it at me
That’s why I also gladly endangered my life
It's okay
Even tomorrow
I will keep getting hurt with a smile
Their intentions force me to enter into a kind of friendship
Their affections force me to vomit up the pain of loss
No one wants to touch something like the love I fearfully show everyone
I'm dirty
With those gentle eyes
The person who praised me
What exactly do they want from me?
What will they take from me next?
My naked body covered in vomit left at the garbage dump due to the bill for my mistakes
Memories tightly grip my numb limbs
Just one more step towards that dazzling sky
Not even allowed to soar
Because I'm a good boy
Because I'm a good boy
Because I'm a good boy
Because I'm a gOoD bOy
How could they love me like this?
From the miniature garden of survival
The alarm bells were ringing
"There's no such thing as definite proof in this world," they said
When I die someday, flowers will be laid upon me and I'll probably be mocked
That's why the fear of death called itself ‘love’ for me
If by my screaming, struggling, flailing, and eventually perishing
Everyone can be happy, then that's enough for me
Please forgive me
For having such clumsy thoughts
I wish my smile would just crumble away
Please, let everyone escape from this ugliness
Since even the things that were truly precious to me
Have all been burnt to death by you
I didn't want to be thought of as a kind person
I didn't want to be called a kind person
I didn't want to become a kind person
I didn't want to become a kind person…
I didn't want to become A KIND PERSON…
There's no way I can love myself
Because I loved my-
Hey, teacher, my, life, is, cheap, too
Hey, teacher, I, can, smile, skillfully
I'm sorry I was born